Solved Challenge: 5 Ways to deal with an Unsatisfying Work situation & to get Your Dream Job

Dear Maya,

When we received your challenge, we have of course come up with the basic 5 options in 5 minutes :). They are “no-brainers”, you already give some of them away in your description. As we read your challenge, you pretty much know what you want to do, it is the process of how to get there, that is a challenge for you. Therefore, this time we have decided to go for the 5 steps of going through such a big life change when still including your basic 5 options.

 

Take a piece of paper

First, we’re going to ask you to make a very simple exercise, which we’ll often be recommending here at You’ve got 5 options. Why? Because it is very simple, yet it really works :). So… take a piece of paper (even a napkin will do :)), open an empty document on your computer, or if none of the options is available, you’ll need to make a mental note. When you read the 5 options, note down what is your first reaction, what you feel, in very simple words: good, bad, scared, excited, squeeze in my stomach, etc.

 

So, your options are:

Option 1: Stay where you are until you find THE job
Option 2: Just go ahead and quit. Now. Today.
Option 3: Get a similar job in another company
Option 4: Go independent. Make your own business.
Option 5: Look for completely new opportunities

Now that you’ve noted down what you felt when you read the options, we’ll walk you through a 5 step process of how we think you can get to the place where you want to be.

 

The Steps we will walk you through, are:

Step 1: Get in touch with yourself
Step 2. Explore your options
Step 3. Become your own best friend
Step 4. Choose the best scenario & make a plan
Step 5. Go for it

 

Step 1: Get in touch with yourself

 

get in touch with yourself.jpg

The main reason to ask you to note down your very first reaction to each of the options is to enable the intuitive, emotional part of you.

 

“The guts” versus “the brain”

When it comes to making life decisions, the key is to find the right balance between the feelings and facts. Some people will be more inclined towards going after their emotions, others will be prone to overthinking.

 

The Feeling & Thinking Equation

I can see that you are not just going after the impulse of quitting your job. You are letting the “thinking” part of you, your brain, to be the boss. It is not necessarily bad! Every single one of us needs to solve the feeling & thinking equation for ourselves. 

The thing is that our brain likes to be efficient, and being efficient, unfortunately for us, for our brain means doing the same thing over and over again. The problem is that we are not just “brains,” and many of us strive for change and development, and we can try to let the brain win some battles, but sooner or later, we’ll probably become miserable.

So if you want to see progress in your life, you need to reconnect with yourself, that inner, intangible part of you, which for some people sits around their chest (“I just followed my heart”) or stomach (“I’ve listened to my guts”).

Each one of us has that inner compass, internal wisdom, that knows exactly what we need to do, we JUST need to learn how to use that compass :-).

 

So, how do you do that?

The answer is quite simple: you do that by spending time with yourself.

Many of us forget how important it is to find that special ME time, the time when we’re not occupying our thoughts with all the everyday stuff, but really listen to what’s going on in our hearts and minds.

There are many ways to spend time with yourself, you can go for a walk or a run, you can meditate, or for example, start writing your journal.

What worked for me when I embarked on that journey of listening to myself, was free flow writing. It’s a very simple method of letting yourself write down all that comes to your mind, right after waking up, when your brain hasn’t fully gone to that comfort zone mode and it allows your subconsciousness to speak for itself (see more about Free Flow Writing here, it’s a short and spot-on article about free flow writing and its benefits).

 

Step 2. Explore your options

Explore your options

So once you are ready to really listen to yourself and you are open to reaching out to your own wisdom, the time has come to explore your options.

 

The Feelings Part

You have the “feelings part” ready from the previous exercise, now it’s time to examine closely some of them.

The one feeling that is worth exploring is the fear. Fear is something natural, but it can really be a show-stopper; if you experience that fear may be one of the feelings that are stopping you from moving forward, then you may want to have a look at the article 5 Options for a Long-distance relationship that wants to close the distance gap (or listen to the podcast) where, in Option 1 we describe a simple exercise that may be useful when dealing with fear. In the same article and podcast, we also discuss further the decision-making process.

 

The Facts Part

The next thing is to explore the “facts” part of your situation. What are the pros & cons of each of the options?

Examples could be:

Option 1: Stay where you are until you find THE job
Pros: Financial stability,
Cons: Feeling miserable, using your life & energy for doing something I really don’t want to do

Option 2: Just go ahead and quit. Now. Today.
Pros: Freedom, Time to look for the job that you really want to have
Cons: Impact on family budget

Option 3: Get a similar job in another company
Pros: You get out of the culture and relations that are not good for you without impacting your budget
Cons: It’s still not what you really want to do, so you’ll probably be just as fed up as now in a few months

Option 4: Go independent. Make your own business.
Pros: You can start doing exactly what you want
Cons: Lack of stability

Option 5: Look for completely new opportunities
Pros: You open up to something new & adventurous
Cons: Lack of stability

These were just some examples. It’s, of course, something that you need to do for yourself :-). Some of our cons could be pros for you and vice versa.

Is any of the options especially attractive to you? Can you feel excitement towards a specific option or options? Do you already KNOW that some of them are simply not the right ones? Maybe you can combine some of the options and figure out your own best way to solve that challenge?

 

Step 3. Become your own best friend

become your own best friend.jpg

Sometimes, even when deep inside we already know what we want to and should do, we let other factors or people influence us and our decision.

Then, of course, we also tend to look for excuses.

Which is why treating yourself as your best friend could be a very good way of getting a bit of a perspective.

It is a really simple step: you ask yourself, what would you recommend to your friend if he/ she was in your situation?

This could be really helpful in identifying what you truly believe is the best option to go after.

Sometimes, even when deep inside we already know what we want to and should do, we let other factors or people influence us and our decision.

Then, of course, we also tend to look for excuses.

Which is why treating yourself as your best friend could be a very good way of getting a bit of a perspective.

It is a really simple step: you ask yourself, what would you recommend to your friend if he/ she was in your situation?

This could be really helpful in identifying what you truly believe is the best option to go after.

 

Step 4. Choose the best scenario & make a plan           

choose the best scenerio.jpg

You are now ready to choose the best scenario.

Come on. You are!

You know your feelings, you know all the pros & cons and you even know what you would recommend to your best friend in this situation, so… there’s nothing stopping you from selecting your favorite option.

So now that YOU know, make a PLAN.

 

How are you going to get what you want?

Depending on which option you have chosen your plan can be anywhere between making a commitment to yourself on how much time you will dedicate to looking for a new job (Option 1: Get in Touch with Yourself) and creating a full-blown business plan (Option 4: Go independent).

In any case, it is a good idea to write down what you want to do and when.

Make a contract with yourself to ensure that you move forward.

 

Step 5. Go for it

go for it.jpg

 

Some people call it a massive action. What kind of action you should take will really depend on the Options you’ve selected.

But even if you have decided to stay where you are and apply for as long as you need to until you get THE job, really Go For It! Make a good plan of how many applications you’ll submit. Boost your CV. Look for creative ways to get that practical experience that you are missing. Network. There really are many ways…

And if it doesn’t work out, well… you can always go for another option. Especially if you’ve made a contract with yourself that you’ll say, continue this way for 3 months and if you get no results, you’ll try Option x.

 

Remember – FAIL is a “First Attempt In Learning”

And if you decide to go for your own business, or for something completely new… open up… try things out. Accept that you will probably need to face some kind of a failure before you are successful, but try to take it on, treat failure as “FAIL” (First Attempt In Learning). The most important thing is that You are the one who takes the decision and that You embrace the power that comes with taking back the responsibility for your own life.

 

Final notes

Approach the process with an open heart and ENJOY. You are embarking on a journey to a much more fulfilling life :-). It’s not necessarily going to be an easy road, but surely you’ll feel that you are more ALIVE.

 

Bonus:

And here are the links to the inspirational stories that we have promised to add for you in our podcast (you can also find them while reading your steps):

1. How I went from Waitress to BuzzFeed Producer in a Year: The story of the "Waitress from the Dominicana Republic" /mentioned in our podcast/

2. A story of Sarah Proust, once divorced single mother with huge debt, today: bestselling author, life coach, happy mom and fulfilled woman.

3. Mel Robbins' 5 seconds Rule

4. "Can’t Seem To Get Started? This One Idea Could Change Your Life" by Marie Forleo